Relationships at Work Can Be Tough to Maintain
There is no question about it. Relationships with people you love take time, energy, and skill. The relationships at work can be all the more challenging. You didn’t necessarily get to choose to spend the eight to ten hours a day you do with the people with whom you work.
One of Dale Carnegie’s fundamental beliefs was that you can influence and change people’s behavior towards you and towards others by first changing your attitude and behavior towards them.
Responsible behavior is a recurring theme in much of what Carnegie wrote and taught throughout his successful career as a writer and lecturer.
In Carnegie’s most influential book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, he outlines different vital principles that can profoundly impact workplace interactions—not to mention the mental health benefits associated.
With your permission, I would like to remind us of common-sense tips that are often neglected keys to having successful relationships – with anyone!
Listen, really listen
Let’s face it, effective listening at work is a skill that takes a lifetime to master.
Read: The Ancient Art of Listening – Do You Really Hear What Others Are Saying?
People who listen carefully are more effective and influential in relationships. Other people trust you and appreciate being heard. Those same people often give the same grace in return.
Become the most interested person in the room, not the most interesting person in the room.
Politeness, civility, and respect
Politeness can indeed influence work culture. By practicing civil and respectful behavior, you can minimize what can be interpreted as being rude or condescending (whether intentional or not). Perhaps you will avoid negatively influencing a coworker’s mood and how they go about their workday.
Politeness matters because it influences people. It’s hard to be rude to a coworker after having been treated with respect and courtesy. Being polite gives the impression that you care. And of course, if you are seen as a colleague who cares, your work colleagues will likely adopt a similar attitude towards you.
You are basically leading by example on this one, a Dale Carnegie trademark concept.
The company will have higher morale, greater job satisfaction, resilient workers, cohesive teams, and consistent productivity. Who doesn’t want to work in a place where people go above and beyond for one another and unsurprisingly experience low turnover and absenteeism?
Authenticity is the only way
Authenticity creates a work culture that encourages people to be more connected with themselves and each other. What follows, naturally, is a greater sense of community and loyalty toward a company or organization.
When employees and their leaders experience a sense of freedom to be themselves in the workplace, their job satisfaction, and overall positive engagement steadily increase. We all perform better when we feel true to ourselves.
If you want your employees to be creative, innovative, problem-solving partners who will go above and beyond what is expected, respect them and allow them to be who they are without apology.
Our stories help bring us together and build relationships at work
Stories help us understand other people and their unique experiences and perspectives.
A good storyteller will draw you in and keep you captivated. When we share our experiences, people want to listen. We see ourselves and our own experiences reflected in the stories people share.
When we listen to others, we begin to fathom the uniqueness and richness of the person and their life story. We are often left marveling at how unexpectedly similar we are and how their story mirrors our own. We all have so much more in common than we realize!
Say you are sorry
Apologies are a necessary, fundamental aspect of successful interactions among coworkers.
Read: The Need for A Good Apology
Our workplace is manned by human beings with feelings and egos, and unique personalities. Therefore, there will always be room for misunderstandings, irritations, and hurt feelings.
All it takes to start an apology is to say you are sorry. Nothing more is required, and nothing less will do. In saying we are sorry, we are doing two things: admitting our guilt and asking for forgiveness and understanding. I have been on both ends of an apology, and I can say that it feels good to receive a genuine, thoughtful “I’m sorry.”
You will have the same positive impact when you apologize to someone else.
Show those pearly whites
Recently we talked about body talk and the power of body language. People hear far more from your actions than your words.
Positive body language can not only improve communication and collaboration, but it can also play a significant role in overall workplace morale.
When we see a coworker smiling at us, our brains are basically hard-wired to return that smile. But, in fact, it isn’t easy, and it requires effort to not smile at somebody who is smiling at you.
Smiling brings many positive health benefits and activates the substances in our brain that help us experience “pleasure”. We decrease stress, lower our blood pressure and heart rate – all from dazzling the world with your smile. In addition, smiling makes us just better people to be around in the workplace. So please, smile as often as you can.
